Sticks and Stones

Scene: Josh sitting on the toilet yells, "Mom I need to tell you something!"

Thinking he needs help with uhhh something I head in there.

Background: Earlier that day we'd been at a play group of sorts with a bunch of other kids. They weren't kids that Josh knew well, but that he was familiar with. I was a little concerned that he wasn't playing with anyone. I'm always a little worried that Josh inherited some of my shyness that partially paralyzed me through high school, and still haunts me somewhat. So while at this playgroup I encouraged him to run around with the other kids and he said, "I just want to sit by you they're being kind of mean."

"How are they being mean honey?"
"One of the kids took my bike."
"Josh, don't be silly we all share bikes here, you can ride someone else's or ask for it back."

But he stubbornly insisted on sitting by me. And knowing from experience that pushing it doesn't help, I let him be - thinking that I wanted to talk to Justin about it and thinking he wasn't feeling very well we headed home.

Back to current scene: I walk into the bathroom, "What's up hun?"
"_______ called me an idiot."
I was totally shocked and instantly my mother bear protectiveness kicked in - but I did know enough about typical three-year-old interactions to ask, "Why did ____ do that?"
"Because I didn't want to play what they were playing. Then everyone else started making mean noises at me. I didn't know what to do so I walked away. What should I do Mommy."

Now I'm hurting for my little boy who is obviously confused why someone would say that to him and wondering what should I say? I want him to be strong and let things like this blow off him, not hold a grudge because honestly they're only three and probably had forgotten it two seconds later so I replied,

"You did good walking away but I want to talk to your Daddy about it and we'll chat again in the morning."

After which he got of the toilet (apparently a place of deep contemplation) and went to bed.

Justin's response to the matter was, "well it's going to happen and he needs to learn to deal with it." Dad's are so much more rational.

So the next day I told Josh, "I talked to Daddy and he said that you should just say, "I'm not an idiot don't talk to me like that." then you should see if they still want to play or just walk away and play something else."

"Ok Mom" with a sweet smile and giggle then, "or I could paint my face like a tiger and scare them all away."

True or that:) I love the resilience of the young. and I am going to have a rough time when my kids go to a big school:)

Next post will have some updates on my Anna bug as I haven't posted on her in awhile and she's had some adventures of her own.